Unlicensed Halloween Costumes for 2020

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image by author

Welcome to Spirit Halloween! While we don’t have the officially-licensed timely costume you’re looking for, we do have these suitable, generic knockoffs that still get the point across:

Bottle of Purell — Sterile Goop Dispenser

Facemask — Blue Mouth Rectangle

Coronavirus — Death Breath Microbe

“Cats” Movie Character — Horny Uncanny Feline

Tom Nook from “Animal Crossing” — Sexy Salesman Racoon

Zoom Window — Could Have Been An Email Box

Jeffrey Toobin — Jerking Journalist

Meghan Markle — Downgraded Duchess

Prince Harry — Flushed Royal

Murder Hornet — Assault Bee

NBA Bubble Player — Plastic Wrapped Athlete

Fly on Mike Pence’s Head — Homophobic Hair Bug

Joe Exotic from “Tiger King” — Zookeeper Roadie

Carol Baskin from “Tiger King” — Midsommer Mama

Cardi B from the “WAP” Video — Moist Crotch Rapper

Ruth Bader Ginsburg — Judicious Doily

Ivanka Trump—Despot’s Daughter

Hunter Biden—Limited Liability

Joe Biden — Teethy Peepaw

Donald Trump — Chinese Taxpayer (bald cap not included)

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Adam Campbell-Schmitt

A writer and editor living, laughing, and loving in the NYC suburbs. Twitter: @adamcswrites